Someday

This is a poem that has much meaning for me at this point in my life. This poem spoke to my heart and my life and flowed down through my fingers needing a voice. For anyone living in an internal darkness, I understand. For anyone surviving not living, I understand. For anyone feeling too much and then nothing at all, I understand. For anyone floating on a cloud of pain, I understand. My answer is someday. Someday I will be fine again.

Someday

Someday I will stand on the top of the mountain

And scream at the top of my voice

I’m fine!

Someday I will swim in the depths of the ocean

And scream over the sound of the waves

I'm fine!

Someday I will sit in the darkest cave

And scream as it echoes off the walls

I'm fine!

Someday I will stand under the drops of rain

And scream over each clash of thunder

I'm fine!

Someday I will lie on the cool, green grass

And scream into the vast blue of the sky

I'm fine!

Someday I will stand under the darkened sky

And scream up at the large mocking moon

I'm fine!

Someday I will sit quiet and alone

And scream into the silence

I'm fine!

Someday I will stand unmoving within the crowd

And scream into the throng

I'm fine

Someday I will return home and open the door

And scream into my sanctuary

I'm fine!

Someday I will take up my pen and put it to paper

And write out in large capitalized letters

I'M FINE!

Someday

I will look into the mirror

And see my outline

And the colors and shadows

That make me beautiful inside and out

Someday

I will look down at my scars

And see the whiteness

And healing powers

Telling me I have strength to out live my pain

Someday

I will open my eyes

After a good night's rest

And smile not cry

Telling me that joy does exist again

Someday

I will cry

But they will be tears of joy

Like a rainbow after the rain

And know that hope resides in my land again

Someday

The flowers will have color

The sun will shine

The moon will not be ominous

And I will know they are watching me even behind the clouds

Someday

I will have hunger

My fingers will ache for my pen and paper

My heart will pound with excitement

And I will know the comfort that I live again

Someday

I will think of your face and your eyes

Remembering the love I felt

Relishing in the memories

And not live the ache of pain anymore

Someday

I will be fine

Someday

I will believe this again

And from the top of the mountain

I will shout

I'm fine!